Our 10-year old is on my mind much, these days. He was BABY for a very long time. And tho' he LOVES LOVES LOVES his sister, he is, in many ways, trying to ensure his place, his position, in our home. In our lives.
I'm not sure it's the easiest of things for him adjusting to our new family structure... and I do not want him to think for a minute, that how we feel or think about him is jeopardized even a fraction. I want to see his heart and not just his actions. I want to see HIM.
Written below, is something I wrote in March of this year. Reading it again was a fresh reminder that I need to be very intentional about spending time with my boy.
200 Million Loads of Laundry
It was around 7:15 p.m. Darkness was approaching yet distant. A wonderful, warm air still lingered, and 10-yr. old was taking full advantage of it. Crazy that 5 days ago we had over a foot of snow on the ground!
He had been asking since we arrived home several hours ago, “Will you play with me? After you do this…… and that? And that? And take older brother? Then? Will you play??" Basketball, that is. He LOVES it. Loves it. And in the hustle-bustle of a typical day, I had indeed put him off, thinking of all I had to accomplish inside the house. Tho’ with Dad working late, I continued to be the chosen one, the target, the pick.
So around 7:15 when I pulled back into the driveway after taking older brother, he was there. Waiting with basketball in hand. “Will you play now? Just P I G. Not even HORSE. We’ll just play Pig." My reply, among other words, “ I have 200 million loads of laundry to do!!!!!!!” Of course, the words were spoken with mighty gusto and great meaning. And the very second that the words came out of my mouth I realized their impact. Their power. I instantly remembered that in a few years, I won’t have a 10-year old begging me to play basketball. I’ll only have the 200 million loads of laundry. He'll be off somewhere, finding enjoyment in someone else's company.
So without another word I dropped my purse in the house, and went to play with my son. We actually played a much longer version of Horse, even. And we had fun. I had fun. He kept bringing up the fact that we were playing longer than he thought we would, and I could tell it meant so much to him. When Dad did get home from work, well after dark, Basketball Boy was still in the driveway waiting. They played a game to 108, if I remember correctly.
The laundry? I’m down to 197 million loads, but it will get done, in due time.
11 comments:
How soon we forget what is really important, I know I am guilty of it. The laundry & house will wait, but the kids grow up so fast. It's the little things that make memories (like a game of horse). I better go & get back to the 250 ears of corn that awaits me, I think I would rather be playing horse.
Talk soon,
Christy
Hey Cindi,
I have been thinking about the huge adjustment Eli has been called to make from being the baby of the family to Ahna's big brother. The miracle of your daughter becoming part of your family is evidence that the Lord has busied Himself with every step of the adjustment in the family. For you and Bill as parents and for Seth, Jacob, and Eli as big brothers of a little sister. May that glad assurance whisper peace to your heart. Shawn
So sweet! And you are so right -- the laundry and the house cleaning, etc. will always be there, but the kids will not always be little and want to play. And I'm sure it's an adjustment to give up being the baby -- i think it was hard even for my 15 yr old when my daughter came home. Take care.
Janet
Thanks Cindi I needed that reminder.
Christel
Great post Cindi.....I have a similar age spread between Nick and Sarah, and you are right....it is very important to spend some quality time with the Boys!
I could relate to your story, and could hear myself uttering that very excuse....the laundry, the housework....it can all wait and it always be there, but our boys are growing quickly...time is of the essence!
Have a wonderful weekend!
Lisa
...what a poignant reminder to not let the mundane details take over the really important moments that are all too fleeting- thanks for sharing!
Sweet! Sounds like you are a great Mom! I know every day I am careful to be sure I have quality play time with my daughter. It is hard with so much going on but I try to make it happen. This post got me all choked up. I will have to give her extra time tomorrow! My step sons Love Love Love their sister and luckily there is no jealousy that I can see. I think the fact that we only have them part time is the reason. When thye are with us it is mainly about them and they always include their sis.
I think your blog pressure of a few posts ago was just the remnants of jet lag. All you needed was some sleep. Your sense of perspective is crystal clear.
who needs clean clothes anyway??
We are all guilty of being so busy that sometimes we forget to make sure we let our kids know how important they are. I cannot wait ot see you guys. I hope all is going well with Ahna.
Oh how this post spoke to my heart....I know my 10 year old still feels the effects of not being "the baby" anymore. We've been home almost 2 years with Addie now, and I still must be intentional in spending time with my son, and making sure he knows how special and important he is to me. Thanks for the reminder.
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